Journal - babepi

Feminism, sisterhood and female solidarity

February 21, 2020 da Barbara

Tiny disclaimer: I began writing this post in 2019 and worked on it in February 2020, as I’d intended. But it wasn’t finished until April 15, 2020. You find it with a February date because I wanted it to belong to that time before a Global Pandemic hit. In those days, this is what I was thinking about. Also, it’s a rant. If you’re looking for something more proactive, please Google Translate C+B, the collaborative project I co-founded in 2013.

It’s February, March will roll over in 10 minutes and we will find ourselves at war. Between women who’d rather be remembered for 364 days than celebrated for one day only, men who’re unsure whether to buy flowers or cower from rebuke, other women seeking to mindlessly celebrate with acquaintances because they were too busy to develop real girl-friendships.

Despite my usual existential optimism, gender issues tend to bring out a nihilistic approach from me; I’d been meaning to write about on the blog for two years.

Specifically, I wanted to discuss three things that are often mistakenly superimposted, and yet they are seldom exercised at once, feminism, sisterhood and female solidarity.

This boggles my mind.

The way my teenage self thought about it, this is the way: every woman should be a feminist by definition, and any feminist woman should aim to reach equality for her whole gender; as a natural consequence she should feel part of a group of peers (a sisterhood), and she should show solidarity for every other woman, providing her help and support.

Then I grew up, I went into the working world, and I found out that some women who are loudly proudly claiming to be feminists are actually fighting for their own equality, not necessarily for the equality of treatment of all women.

I discovered that some women achieve manager positions by pretending not to be a woman, as if they were ashamed of their gender, choosing instead to act like men and making sure no other woman will have the same opportunities they had. As if they thought their success was just a product of some token positioning, so any other woman could usurp it. I was enraged by these examples, and at the same time, I pitied the women who could not shake such an impostor syndrome and own their own well-deserved success.

I attended some Women Entrepreneurs meetings and listened to female entrepreneurs discussing maternity leave and their female employees not differently from what men would have done. I kept a guilty silence (silence is always guilty when an injustice is witnessed, this I know), but I was mostly sad for the opportunity smart women lost to make a difference.

Then Instagram came. On this platform you could be a small influencer and at once find yourself sleeping with a good friend’s boyfriend (after she’d invited you into her home, to support you). I’m told these are things that can happen to anybody, but in the spirit of the sisterhood, you could at least come clean to your friend as soon as you felt the urge to go through with it. You could at least apologize, and feel like shit. On Instagram, instead, you go on to post endlessly about feminism, about your lofty values, you gather the praise of fans who look up to you as a muse while leaving it to that spineless douche who’s your friend’s boyfriend to come clean. Your conscience was washed cleaned by posting about feminism anyway.

The very specific story above is real. It happened last year to people I know. When I scheduled this post idea I meant to write the full names of the people involved for two reasons:

first of all, I find it appalling that anybody can profit from a fake moral image. The woman who slept with her friend’s boyfriend runs a business where here personal values are central to her value proposition. Those personal values are a hoax;
secondly, I believe silence is guilty, not stating that what’d happened was wrong made me feel physically ill. As if by not pointing my finger I had become an accomplice.

But there are no names in this blog post because at the end of the day I realized the link between feminism, sisterhood, and female solidarity had a resonance. And the spineless douche boyfriend would have suffered no consequence of being exposed.

If being a feminist means to fight for equal opportunities; if sisterhood is about feeling like all women are on the same boat; if female solidarity manifests itself in lending a hand when another woman stumbles, staying by her side to help her fend off attacks, and helping her climb with us.

If these three things are intertwined (and I think they are), this blog post was an opportunity to remind us of it, and to try and forget all of those times we were meant to say “I’d rather work/spend time with men. At least I know how to defend myself.”

Finally, I would like us to remember that claiming to be a feminist, then disregarding sisterhood and female solidarity, is an empty claim.

That woman who’s walking around with her fake moral will have to face her own conscience. To herself she’ll have to explain not so much how she fell for her friend’s partner (it happens), but why she didn’t have the courage and sensibility to face the music like a woman, rather than like a man.

Cover photo by Becca Tapert/Unsplash.

Annette Joseph, styling icon

February 7, 2020 da Barbara

When I resumed blogging for myself I made a not that I wanted to talk about my styling icons, stylists, and art directors I admire and look up to for inspiration and guidance. They’re all women, some near some far, some I’ve had the honor to get to know personally.

Then there’s Annette Joseph, who not only became a close friend and somebody I can collaborate with on special projects, but also a lady I discovered a peculiar personal affinity with.

This article tells the story of how I work with Annette, and what you can learn from her and our common experience.

These are not styling tips, but veritable life lessons that have come to support my approach to creative projects. This is why I thought they would be valuable for anybody who wants to do a creative job.

I started following Annette on Instagram around 2015, after having re-read an old post on Design*Sponge that showcased her Alassio apartment, and another one about the interiors she’d designed for Gwyneth Paltrow. Up until that moment I’d known of Annette mostly as an entertainment stylist and creative producer, but I found myself loving her versatile approach and somewhat recognizing style choices I would have similarly made. And that is why I started following her more closely.

Follow creative professionals you feel in tune with, regardless of how many followers they have or of their fame.
– Barbara Pederzini

In the summer of 2016, Annette began renovations of her new Italian home, La Fortezza. Only recently I’d witnessed a couple of clients of mine bought a dilapidated building in the Modena hills only to find out later it was inhabitable. So when I saw she was dealing with what looked like similar complications I did what I normally do when I have a chance: I reached out with informative advice. Not the annoying kind (“why didn’t you do this?!”), but the gracious and truly helpful kind (“I love what you’re doing! You probably already know, but you might want to do this”). Annette replied with her email and an invitation to keep in touch since we have similar professions and Modena is reasonably near to Fivizzano.

If you decide to reach out to somebody you admire, do so providing something useful without expecting anything in return. You shouldn’t care about immediate rewards but about building a relationship.
– Barbara Pederzini

In the spring of 2018, the first pictures of the renovated Fortezza appeared on Annette’s feed, and they were gorgeous. So I went to Giusi Silighini (editor in chief of CasaFacile, back then) and suggested we should try and get an exclusive for the first print feature of the completed compound. When Giusi agreed, I involved Chiara Battistini and Sara Guarracino (Infraordinario), with whom we’d long discussed tackling an original interiors project. It was thus as a producer that I wrote to Annette submitting our proposal.

A few weeks ago we were discussing random proposals with Annette, and she told me about the frustration of getting general requests for collaboration. “Honestly nothing turns me off more than a long and rambling email, I won’t read it. Five sentences should be enough to do an introduction and ask your question,” said Annette. Also, people often seem to expect her to come up with the idea for the collaborative project. Anybody who has a creative job and some visibility is likely to receive this kind of generic proposals… and knows how often they end up being off-putting rather than inspiring.

For me, everything is about being on-brand these days. If I am approached by a company to sell products it has to be on-brand for me otherwise it is a no. At the end of the day, I have to love the look, the feel and the vision of the product to be inspired.
– Annette Joseph

And the same works for collaborative projects.

Beyond the way I submitted my proposal to Annette, the project had two key elements that I later discovered were perfectly aligned with her approach. In hindsight, the fact that we saw something of ourselves in each others’ work approach was part of the reason why we bonded so quickly.

A project at once entertaining and inspiring

From the start, I was drawn to Annette’s La Fortezza because it combined interior decor features I love with an approach to styling that I think can be inspiring to anybody.

On the one hand, my personal creative affinity with Annette made it easier to work with the interiors, and it allowed me to elaborate more freely on it, while not altering its identity. It is not always possible to get this scope: “I think we have a very similar point of view, it’s why we bonded instantly. Like a creative soulmate thing. Your smart approach to projects always inspires me. Although we are alike, there is enough of a difference to make it interesting,” said Annette.

That being said, La Fortezza in itself is a unique project, packed with decor ideas easy to replicate on a smaller scale. That made the story interesting for any audience.

As a stylist, you are hired to bring your inspiration to a project, while supporting the story.
– Annette Joseph

A supportive network with shared goals

The second element grounding our La Fortezza shoot was the team behind it. I’ve been making a habit of keeping track of creatives I admire and want to work with over time so that when I happen upon a project, I already have a wishlist of collaborators in mind that could benefit from it, and be comfortable with it.

The concept of a supportive collaborating network, even if it’s just on paper, in the beginning, and the approach of looking at prospect projects as opportunities for all parties involved to shine is about economy of resources for me. And yet it makes working on projects that much easier.

That being said, “the truth is sometimes clients are challenging,” as Annette said to me more than once. But when someone on the extended team is not your favorite person in the world, you should welcome the challenge.

It is easy to work with like-minded people, it is a true success making people that are not like-minded to come over to your point of view or come to a compromise. It takes tact, understanding, and lots of insight and good communication. After all a stylist, in the end, understands how to communicate.
– Annette Joseph

Own it and work it

Spending time with Annette, and working alongside her, teaches me something new every time. But the most impactful insight I had from her was to stop doubting myself and to channel my energies into owning my talents and working them. There will always be a new skill to learn, something new to practise, ways to perfect my style and abilities. But I am talented as I am, and I can become even better if I embrace that as I work.

That’s why whenever I have an idea these days, I immediately reach down to somebody I want to make it happen with. It doesn’t matter if that person is much more successful than I am, or if their collaboration seems unattainable. And if it’s a solo project I immediately jump on strategizing to make it happen or to schedule it.

If the project doesn’t work out I move on, I don’t consider it a failure but just a stepping stone in a longer learning process.

I found out that I grow and expand my mind much quicker through practice then through study.
– Barbara Pederzini

And here’s my takeaway for you. When you stop reading this, close your device and pick up an idea or a project you’ve been nursing for a while. Think about who you want to share it with and write to them. If you have nobody in mind yet, pick the smallest, most simple task to start the project yourself and do it now! You are enough.

Welcome to 2020, and my review of Interior Design Masters

January 14, 2020 da Barbara

So, 2020 began with the proverbial bang, and January has turned out to be a pivotal month for my career, which will account for many a conversation in the future, I’m sure.

This article, however, is about Interior Design Masters and the way it lends itself to a number of reflections about creative work as well as interior design.

A reality show about interiors and the creative process

The first season of Interior Design Masters landed on Netflix International on October 19 2019, and I binged it over a weekend, having loads of fun.

It all boils down to two main reasons, the first one fairly personal, the second a more objective one.

The judge, Michelle Ogundehin

The first element I loved about the format was appointing Michelle Ogundehin as the series judge. I might be biased because I’ve admired Ms. Ogundehin for over a decade since she took over the role of editor in chief at Elle Decoration UK. Her monthly editorials were an inspired mixture of feeling and sharp design instinct, and I’ve kept the majority of them in a binder.

To be honest, I’ve also pre-ordered her first book which sounds like a perfect and natural expansion on those same editorials.

The same balance of honest heart and a strong sense of what commercial interior design is, is what brought some of the highest moments in Interior Design Masters because Ogundehin manages to convey some very direct and invaluable lessons to the contestants while always feeling and showing compassion for their passion, effort, and journey.

It is a pleasure to watch and a great teaching opportunity for anybody with a strong interest in the business and a creative approach.

Business lessons for creative types

The second reason why Interior Design Masters is so interesting to watch is that most of the key teaching moments in the show apply to any creative professional doing commercial work and something not all creative professionals have come to terms with.

‘Listen to your client’, ‘Ultimately the design has to work for the client’, ‘A signature design is not always the right answer to the brief’ are just some of the hard truths all creatives have to face, sooner or later.

And yet, so many designers, architects, decorators, stylists tend to ignore these truths, often ending up with designs that don’t fulfill the brief. Or that won’t survive the first week of real life.

The Interior Design Masters judges never condone these mistakes. And that is something I loved.

What I loved a little bit less was the way some interior conundrums were addressed…

Interior conundrums and my solutions

While watching the show there were a few conundrums that contestants were met with that I felt were not addressed properly, and that I feel I would have come up with the right solution for. I’ve decided to write about them here as a little exercise.

I get it. To create conflict in the show, writers need to get contestants to make a few dumb mistakes, here and there. However, it’s a pain to watch an excellent show when people in it come up with the least efficient and more absurd solutions to problems!

Here’s a list of a few instances when a simple interior conundrum was not addressed properly and the solution I would have come up with. To be clear, my solutions might not be the absolute best, but I thought it’d be a nice exercise to detail them. Maybe this will help anybody who’s facing the same challenges.

Episode one – show homes

Conundrum: how to style rooms to inspire a viewer to desire to own the place and live in it, without scaring them off.

My approach: I feel the ego should be left outside of any such project. Show homes are not designed to wow guests but to entice as many people as possible into thinking, “I want to live here!”. It’s only natural that this kind of project should be very market-oriented and a little bit expected.

My solution: I think the best way to approach this is by sticking to nuances from a single palette for the whole project, creating cohesion from room to room. Decor-wise I would pick a few grounding pieces (think a big sofa and two chairs for a living room), accessorizing them with props that a prospective buyer could easily pick within any budget.

Episode three – the skateboard store

Conundrum: how to display as much merchandise as possible (as per the owner’s request) while not making the store look unnecessarily cluttered?

My approach: when a client demands something impractical or counter-intuitive, my first reaction is always to research what lies beneath this request. What is the client’s actual need and/or priority behind it? What reasoning led them to believe they should ask for this? In this episode, it turns out the skateboard store was famous for having the most complete range of specialty products in the Country, and its owner believed he had to display them all to be relevant.

My solution: truth be told, you don’t really need to display every single item you sell in a store, but you should edit and curate a selection of items that carefully reflect your full range. It’s very much about careful editing and inventive storage. For example, board wheels could be stored in deep drawers similar to hardware shop ones, with a sample wheel at the front of each drawer. Any shopper could see all available wheels at first glance, while the display would be streamlined and organized.

Episode four – dorm rooms

Conundrum: how to make the multifunctional storage units work in a tight space?

My approach: think about the client; they hold all the answers. And this instance isn’t different, the clients being students (of course) who’re living alone for the first time, and maybe don’t even know what they’d like/want yet. But what’s their daily life like? And what would make it easier? Answering these questions should be the first step in designing these rooms.

My solution: raising beds on tall storage units is a good idea to make the most of tight rooms… but only insofar as the storage units are not too tall to climb and are fully equipped with deep drawers mounted on castors, inner compartments, and shelving behind every door. I would have made it super easy to fill with the student’s possession and sort them, and stupidly quick to open and put away. Fewer props around and more smart choices in the black canvas of the rooms.

Every episode

Conundrum: how to paint props and furniture fast without compromising on quality?

My approach: balancing priorities, duh.

My solution: this kept blowing my mind throughout the series. Watching all that brush painting when spray painting would have been much faster and more effective. Brush painting is ideal when you have the time to do proper brushwork, to let the item sit and dry, and to do fine detailing. But when you have to mass-paint big props and items, spray paint is the only smart answer. Just think about it, Frank. With spray paint, you could have had your lighting fixture in the country home living room instead of having to go with Cassie’s rattan solution!

And that’s all for my first blog post of 2020.

What about the rest of the year? Let’s just say I hope to be able to publish a blog post roughly every two weeks. I will attempt to cover different topics to reflect many interests I have, keeping a reasonable balance between tutorials and more personal reflections. Like this piece, although I hope it will be useful to somebody out there.

What not to expect from this blog:

any artifice;
the kind of mock-intimate discourse like we knew each other. I have honestly no control over who lands here and no clear idea of who you, my reader are, so I see no point in pretending otherwise.

To be perfectly honest, I wish you’d surprise me if we ever met IRL.

45 days to end the year

November 15, 2019 da Barbara

What does it take to properly prepare for the new year and the world of opportunity it will bring along? 5 minutes chugging champagne from a disposable cup? A couple of hours to save important dates on a new planner? Half a day to draft the year planning? Two days spent at an intensive mastermind retreat? I think anything goes, but I’ve also decided to devote the last 45 days of 2019 to set up 2020. And I wrote this blog post for anybody who’s interested in joining me.

How did it all begin

At first, it all was about getting ready for Atlanta and making sure my brand, business, and website were up for it. But then I realized I will be working every weekend (but one) until 2020. Which prompted this very reasonable reaction:

via GIPHY

I like to think of myself as a pale Mindy Lahiri, and like her, I tend to deal with complicated situations by coming up with elaborate solutions. Like setting up a challenge to inspire my feast of a year-end to-do list!

That is how the idea came to fruition to devote the last 45 days of 2019 to follow through with my plans for Atlanta, while also accomplishing one tiny task every day. And Instagramming it for posterity, which will both serve as an accountability action and provide content for my randomly populated grid.

How it works

Starting on November 17, and going on for 45 days, the challenge will see me perform daily activities to prepare for a pretty pivotal year.

On Instagram today I will post the summary image, for anybody to use as a reminder on how to follow me and the challenge itself.

Daily tasks will be evenly spread among different categories:

mental/emotional health
baby steps
simplicity
creativity
body
money
work

These are the categories where I need prompts to accomplish my to-do list, but I tried to keep tasks as general as possible so anybody can join.

Anybody can join

That’s it. You don’t have to own a business to benefit from this challenge, you don’t need grand plans or big dreams. You don’t even need new year resolution, and you don’t need to be the kind of person that makes new year resolution in the first place.

In fact, you could be any gender/age/etc., be at any point in your life, because this challenge doesn’t have any designated start point or goal.

I feel a good preparation for a new year is about:

shaking up our perception of the world
training us to be aware of our purpose

In short, this challenge is not about controlling your future through meticulous planning, it’s about waking up from your stifling routines and regaining awareness of your desires and of the power you have to fulfill them.

If this is something you need, feel free to join me.

The challenge is now over, but if you think you need a reset you can download the free workbook. You can complete the forty-five days to reset anytime you feel the need. Click here to download the workbook.

There’s an hashtag to follow

It’s not about being trendy, but it’s about making it easy for people to feel part of a community accomplishing something together.

I’m usually the solitary type but I get it that some people need the comfort of numbers or an accountability buddy or two. If that’s you, following #45daysyearend will allow you to stay on track and be inspired.

I think I might also start following it, to find inspiration when I feel like getting some, or to explore alternative points of view on the daily tasks I accomplish.

I will send instructions via email

If you want to have more details about each activity or suggestions and further reading about them, I’ve got you covered. Every Sunday I will send a newsletter with a nifty task list for the following seven days as well as instructions for each. On week 2 I will begin adding a small recap of my previous week.

Every message will be short and to the point, I will not try to sell you anything, nor it will be required for you to interact or do anything after receiving them. Every message will be easy to print so that you can carry it with you.

You can always unsubscribe from the emails, and at the end of the challenge, I will write to you to remind you to press unsubscribe or to stick around if you’re interested in more content.

Anything goes

There are no special rules for this challenge. You can join me for a day, five, all of them, or none at all but coming along for the spectacle.

The only rule to abide by is to not let guilt or impostor syndrome get to you, should you choose to join and then quit. The task list is a tool, if it no longer serves you… ditch it.